You KNOW when you know

As I mentioned, this was my first pregnancy. So as much as I had been told what the signs of labor were, you don't really know until you KNOW! It's like having your first orgasm. Up until you have it you may wonder if you did, but there is no doubt in your mind once you've actually had it! Same with labor.

With my low PAP-A protein issue, I had been told that it could cause preterm labor, but Eva was growing right on schedule so the specialists told me they were pretty confident I wouldn't have anything to worry about. Not to mention, I had gestational diabetes, which threatens post-term labor and large babies. So I figured, great...that evens our Eva out perfectly. She would arrive on time and perfectly sized.

Again, I knew better in my soul. I had terrible nightmares throughout my pregnancy that Eva would arrive before we were at all prepared. The most memorable one of these dreams was when I sent Matt out to buy a car seat because they wouldn't let us take her home from the hospital without one and the numbnuts returned with a duffle bag...

I was so nervous about this that I almost murdered my mother when she was pretending she wouldn't grant my wishes of a pre-32 week baby shower so that we were prepared. You know, just in case...

Week 34 hit and I figured I was stretching and having Braxton-Hicks contractions finally. The funny nerve pinch feeling was probably just Eva getting into position. That gross glob of nastiness that I saw dislodge itself into the toilet was supposed to happen...right? I knew it my guts Eva was coming early, but I was afraid to say it out loud. I had 2 specialist appointments that week. One was a biophysical and one was with my GD doctor. Both were ultrasounds and both came back perfectly normal and no cause for alarm. When I went for my 34 week appointment with my regular OB/GYN, I convinced her to do an internal exam because I was due to go to Richmond in a few days...2 cm dilated, 90% effaced=not leaving New Castle County.

In some ways I was panicked. Would Eva be okay coming so early? Would I actually go into labor yet or be one of those chicks that walks around 4cms dilated for 3 weeks? I was soooooooo not emotionally, mentally or physically prepared for the event of labor. Shit.

The next day, a Tuesday, I went to the hospital because contractions began. After several hours there, they sent me home and told me to return if the contractions were stronger AND closer together, not either/or. They promised that I would "know" when it was time to come back.  I took their word for it.

Wednesday, I put myself on a couch-rest. I didn't have a contraction all day and I felt great. I breathed a sigh of relief....until it was 8:00pm and the charting began.  I had contractions all night. Slept 20 mins for every hour, but I was still questioning whether or not I "knew" it was time to go back.

The next morning (Thursday now), I still didn't know for sure, but I was brought to tears (ugly, gut-wrenching, I-want-my-mommy-tears) at the thought of being home by myself that day. What if I went into fast labor and the baby came before Matt could come pick me up (this is like the most laughable fear I had my entire pregnancy...a short, fast labor HAAA! HA!). Matt had a big meeting that morning. He called my mom for advice at 6:00am. My mother, who is a saint, hopped in the car and was on 95 towards Delaware in less than 10 mins, due to cross the state line by 10. I felt relieved and sent Matt on his way to get ready for work while I continued charting the crazy hardening and pulling of my abdomen.

Matt left for work and I sat down on the couch to watch a recorded episode of "So You Think You Can Dance" from the night before. And that's when I "knew". The show started with Cat Deely introducing the "jjjjdges" and I thought to myself, "Cat Deely? That's not her name. Why are they calling her that??". Then she introduced the contestant dancing first and I thought, "Brandon? That's not even a name at all..." and I luckily still had the sanity enough to realize I was becoming completely delirious. I sat up and looked at the dog by my side, who was staring back at me with concern. "Ok, you are Brady." I put my hand to my chest, "I am Jane. I am having a baby today." I called my mom to report my delirium to someone and she asked me to read the last 10 charted contraction times to her...

6:51
7:07
7:17
7:19
7:24
7:30
7:32
7:35
7:39
7:42...

She told me to call Matt right away and haul my ass to the hospital while I was still pregnant!  So I called Matt.  He said he hadn't even turned on the last of his 3 computer monitors on his desk by the time I called, that's how fast he had to come back for me.

It was Thursday, July 16, 2009. All I remember thinking was, "Damn. I don't like how July 16th sounds as a birthday".  How naive I was to think I'd only have a 24 hour labor...